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Life after Facebook

"If it hasn't happened on Facebook - it doesn't count!" one of my nieces said! Maybe she was right? I've always thought I didn't have to save pictures because I would always have access to them there! Brilliant, wasn't it!?? mmmmmmm...... not so much!

My entire life has disappeared! My account has been hacked. Over the summer I got more and more messages on Facebook, Instagram and in my inbox and I tried to answer the ones I weighted as true and to ignore the false ones. On all medias. And I had a lot. And I used a lot of time trying to communicate with META and the Facebook team...... but they never answered me back.

No - they just kept on writing me that the would disable my account if I didn't provide proof that I was a real person, send them two steps-confirmations, answering the security questions, changing passwords. Everything - I did everything they asked me to do. Was I annoyed? Yes, at some point I got annoyed because it seemed to go on and on and I never had any replies from any questions I sent, the emails I sent to clear this mess up.

I use my Facebook a lot - I keep in contact with my family - living 1000 kilometers away I use the media to "feel in touch" with the daily life of my family and friends living there. I use it for my business - because I haven't got much money to pay to big adds and billboards...... maybe I was naïve to think I could keep it up, but smack me! I believe that it should be possible to have online presence without being a highroller!

And now I was questioned as to I WAS A REAL PERSON......!!? From a media that doesn't have any email address for you if you don't have an account? And that automatically sets you up with a chatbot when you send messages? Hmmmm, interesting!

I've posted pictures of myself, I've always tried to stay authentic and true to who I am - and I'm not afraid to post slightly stupid, embarrassing or indeed to share moments or thoughts others might not want to share; that I absolutely LOVE hotdogs. Or that I have been known to eat so much meat that I've had what I call "a meat hangover" - or that I smoke one cigar a year to at least have ONE resolution for the new year that I can keep!!

Or this picture from our wedding - to prove that I've found my perfect match! Not the picture perfect, snip and tuck-image you normally would like to share! I have shared! So - I wonder how they can ask if I am a genuine person!!??

I'm not scared to not fit in. I don't fit in, and haven't done so for .... well, let's be honest - my entire life.

So I've always been very "me" on my media - because I do believe that people should know what they get when they choose to do yoga with me.

Someone once said "But, Mrs. Adams - do you realize that there are so many mistakes - spelling and grammatical - in your flyer?" My answer was: "Yes, I know - because that's who I am. I've done it myself - and as I'm not perfect, neither is the flyer!"

I'm not perfect - far from it.... and it has become even more evident, especially after The Incident; I have realized that after I was blocked from Facebook that I've used enormous amounts of time just falling into the "scrolling rabbit hole", using a lot of energy and time to check everything in connection with interests - and more and more NOT connected to anything, actually..... just.... scrolling... scrolling...... and suddenly I've lost hours on absolutely nothing! - and videos of cute cats!

And I'm a little embarrassed to say this, as I've been a hard-core promoter to NOT be addicted to social media as it makes us think we should be different to be more "fitting"!

The last 2 weeks I've only been existing in the parallelworld, not Facebook. And I must say I'm much more calm, I don't have to relate to stuff and comments and tags. I find myself not hanging on to my phone at all times. It doesn't go "bing" all the time - and don't react like a Pavlovian dog every time! I have got more time!

"What do you do with all that extra time, then?", you might ask? Well, I don't know yet. Right now I've finished an online certification I started in 21 but never "had the time" to do (more like "would rather like to use my time scrolling!) until now. I journal more, use time listening to audio books or radio programmes that I find interesting. And most of all - I have to search the things I want to know; news, stories, descriptions, so I've become more focused because I'm NOT lured into a rabbit hole I didn't know was there. No, now I have to search what I want to know - and only that! And I'm not seeing personalized adds all the time! I think that will mean I'll spend less money!

So - I don't know if I want to reengage with facebook now. Yes, I know, businesswise I could benefit from it.... but right now I just like the peace too much!

You should try it!! Life after Facebook is great!!

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1 Comment

Michael Bottlinger
Michael Bottlinger
Sep 19, 2023

Dear Fleur, you are so right. Using Facebook makes depressive (according to serveral scientific studies). And many people become addicted. Asocial Media!!

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