For many years I didn't want to be connected to yoga and what I bevlieved the practice represented. I was critical and found all the hype around it too much, and I didn't understand how one single thing could have the benefits for everything body and mind related.
The people I met and connected with doing yoga also had a tendency to exalt themselves to be better than the people who hadn't seen the yogic light...... "yes, I am a better person than you because I do yoga and sh*t!" *deep Darth Vader-breath and eyes rolling back into their skulls*
2015 I had a massive change in my life; I got married, my work contract expired, I moved to another country and culture, I moved away from friends and contacts - in short I needed to start over! Until then I had been working and making money - and yes, it was great.... but I missed doing spiritual work! I missed expanding my knowledge - and in '15 I had the opportunity to start afresh. I choose yoga. I followed my body, did what it made me do to feel good. Today I am very happy in the choice I made.
I am still critical !I still feel as if yoga people around me look down at my teaching and practices, because I do not cater for the skinny, bendy yogi! The one who can do all poses to perfection, or do handstands and wheel without any stress.
I like to work with "normal" people! "I've never done yoga before!"-people or "I can't do yoga, my boobs are out of control!"-people, they are my kind of yogis!
They are not impressed by what they see, but what they feel and the progress they themselves can track in body and mind. I like that.
Let's not forget that yoga means "to unite" - to yoke. You use the physical practice to find your balance in your physical, mental and spiritual body - and yoga is always individual! How would anybody else know what is good for you or how exactly you feel moving in or out of a pose?
BALANCE is the word for me! I use the yoga to find my balance in my life where I also ride a motorbike, eat bacon burgers and drink beer.
And I do feel a necessity to do yoga; I want both sides of Life - and luckily I have the tools to balance it out so I don't become too touchy-feely and holy....... I'm just a normal person who likes to do yoga!
That being said, I do feel different. I feel the benefits of yoga, also so much that I can feel when I've done too little or too much (yes, it can happen!) and I need a break.
My physical body is much better! I don't need medicine or booze to get through my daily life. I had a very badly herniated lower back disc and my doctor at a time said I couldn't do anything else than get an operation! And yet, here I am!! Also my self-awareness is much better. I am more conscious about how I actually feel, in body and mind, and what to do to balance it out again.
I am not slimmer - I maintained my (over)weight, basically because I love beer and meat, but I am stronger and tightened because I do work out almost every day.
I am calmer. I can find peace of mind. I don't need to have a radio or TV on when I am alone anymore. I can comfortably sit in my own - slightly boring - company. I don't need to act all the time; and I think the constantly doing/acting is something women often have! Maybe it's a control thing?? Or maybe it's an age thing?.... anyway I like to find the quiet and just sit. When I do that it feels as if I slow down time and the quality of my being is higher!
I have become more aware of my part in making the world a better place; vegetables and fruit I try to get eco and locally sourced, as I want to support my local farmers as well, I try to lower my use of plastics (but OMG! I miss a good cottonbud!), I sort my trash and pick up when I see something left in the street.
The biggest difference is that I don't eat as much meat as I used to! Being a Viking I thought I needed some kind of meat every day - but now I've realised I can weeks without meat. It has also meant I realised what kind of effect the meat-intake has! How I feel when I've eaten meat and how the different animals feel in my body!
Fish is the lightest, it has almost no effect on me and I like the taste of it - and on top of that digestion is fast and easy. I often eat salmon or tuna steaks.
Chicken is the second best - and I opt for an eco raised one, better taste, you don't feel as if you need to eat loads. I tend to oven cook it over a long period so it keeps the juice and thereby the taste.
If I eat meat I often opt for game, lamb, or beef, as the porc gives me acid reflux - but not on day where I teach. I become heavy and tired - I cal it "meat hangover", as my body tries to recover from an extreme intake of someting that isn't good for me!
I've realised that I feel the best when I eat as cleanly as possibly - raw, green, loads of water - and that my body has a higher frequency. With this I feel my self-awareness becoming higher and it's easier to find and maintain my inner balance.
But sometimes I just NEED a baconburger! With a soda on the side. And mayo. And fries....... and maybe a beer! - and I do it! I enjoy it, feel the effects of it...... and then I'm back on the food that makes me feel better!
That's balance!